ihateyou_kthx
Sep. 23rd, 2007
10:38 pm
When I told my youth pastor at church about a home situation last year, she told me I would go to hell because I had yelled at my parents.
Well, can you fucking blame me?
I havn't gone to church since.
10:18 pm - Oh, and my stepdad's a jem, too.
My mom was bitching and moaning about how much she hates my stepdad and how we're gonna move (which is a bunch of shit, considering we don't have any money). And she was mad that I told her off about how I hate that she won't stop drinking and that I can't stand to be around her. She's also complaining about the fact that he left the TV on in the family room.
He comes out of his room and this is the conversation that follows:
Him: What're you two fighting about now?
Her: You wanna turn off the TV that you left on?
Him: Yeah. Sure. Fucking fantastic.
Her: Well, you left it on.
Him: *looking at me* Turn it off.
Me: Why am I dragged into this? It has nothing to do with me.
Him: *smug little smirk* I don't know.
Me: *turns back to dishes* Fuck you.
Him: *to my mom* She just said, "fuck you." It's not the first time either.
Me: Yeah, 'cause I hate you.
Him: I HATE YOUR FUCKING GUTS.
Me: Good.
Him: Little fucking demon.
Her: I'm gonna call your mom and have you go live with her.
Him: *goes back in room and slams door*
I want to leave.
I wish I could just start my own life without having to deal with their bullshit.
I'm so sick of it.
09:43 pm - I have a lunatic of a mother.
Her bipolar, alcoholic, manic depressive attitude is enough to drive anyone crazy.
I love her to death but I can't stand to be around her most of the time.
Sure, have a beer.
No, I don't care.
But don't expect to talk to me afterward.
Stop making dad out to be the only bad guy here.
You're the worst out of the two of you.
Maybe when I go off to college, I'll cut off all contact with my family.
Maybe that's the only way I'll ever be entirely happy.
Sep. 18th, 2007
06:48 pm
I'm so sorry you're hurting.
You don't know how much that tears at my insides.
Knowing I can do nothing to stop the pain.
I can only do my best to ease it.
I've been in your position and it's not an easy place to be.
I'm here for you and I'll never leave your side.
You can lean on my shoulder and I won't judge you for it.
You're my best friend and I couldn't love you any more than I do.
Stop torturing yourself.
It's a big step.
But one you must take.
Your life depends on it.
And I depend on you.
You can take my hand.
I won't lead you astray.
Sep. 15th, 2007
10:51 am - Well, if you insist.
Don't count how many times we've fought. Don't keep track how much money you've spent on me; when I've spend ten times that amount on you. Don't ask my opinion; then say you don't care what I think.
Don't say I'm a bad friend.
When you're even worse.
I'm finished wasting my time on friends who aren't worth the heart-ache. I'm finished blaming myself for other people's mistakes. I'm finished alowing people to walk all over me.
I'm finished with you.
I hope this breaks your heart.
contemplativeSep. 11th, 2006
08:25 pm - To all of you who said I'd never amount to anything:
I'm going to prove you wrong.
You'll see.
forgive but don't forget
all that they've ever done
don't waste your time
worrying about their next step
worry about your own
you'll be better than them
reach for the stars
and don't let go
dream on
dream on